#RESIST “You Should…” Christianity

Would you agree that there are a LOT of Christians out there “should-ing” all over other Christians? “You should do this… Maybe you should do that… What should happen is… A True Believer should hold this belief/position/moral position…” and on and on. Many times after hearing from them directly or reading other Christian’s posts along these lines, I am tempted to be discouraged. But then I remember a very relevant phrase from the lexicon of “90’s” support group cliches. I wish I could put up a big red neon blinking sign saying, “Stop ‘should-ing’ on me.”

In today’s climate, one tends to think that it’s the conservative branch of Christianity “should-ing” all over everyone else. I mean come on, they have been really good at it for decades now. But, it’s not limited to that branch in the Church. I see progressive Christians doing the same all the time. There are a couple of progressive Christian blogs that get incredibly large amounts of traffic for basically ranting against their conservative Christian siblings. Apparently, regardless of flavor, it’s popular for Christians to tell each other what they should do and how it should be done.

Of course, there are times to call out injustice, bullying, arrogance, and issues that oppress, alienate and disenfranchise. However, I believe it’s time to personally #RESIST the lazy nature of ranting and trying to impose “shoulda, coulda, woulda…” Christianity on others (regardless of whatever perspective we are coming from.)

Yes, I am saying ranting is lazy. Just an opinion :).

I confess I can be pretty should-y myself. I am not afraid to own that; you know, strong personality and whatever. I’mma do me; you do you, Boo. However, I commit to resisting the temptation to “should” on people. I want to work out my own faith by actually living out what I believe in both public and private. I want to compel with reason, motivate through inspiration … not seek to manipulate the like-minded with anger or disparage opponents (or even enemies) with scorn and shame.

Maybe you can relate.


  1. Well said, Randy. As a conservative Christian I know I/we’re very good at “shoulding.” It’s also so very true that just about any and ALL Christian groups, in fact, pretty much all religious groups & organizations who have a moral code, sacred writings, ethical guidelines, etc. “should” from their perspective and we can learn a LOT by listening to ourselves and others rather than having the next “should” ready.


    1. thanks Dann. I especially love, “…we can learn a LOT by listening to ourselves and others rather than having the next “should” ready.” Totally agree.


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