A year ago today I “came out” for the second time in my life. This post contains some thoughts along these lines and begins with some background for those that might be interested.
Background (Abridged version I promise): I thought I was gay at the age of 10, accepted it when I was 13, came out to my parents (was outed by them) at 19. I was a nominal Christian at that time but no real consistent spiritual life. Became “born-again” and placed a genuine belief in Christ at age 24 (23 years ago.) I didn’t become a Christian to become straight; I truly had an encounter with Christ. But over time I was pointed toward the Church closet (ex-gay ideology, The Gospel according to Reparative Therapy) and I moved in and eventually started rearranging the furniture to accommodate more people to join me.
That all started falling apart years ago (as all legalistic and stigmatizing systems do) which eventually led me to “coming out” as a gay man for a second time on January 12, 2015.
Placing my faith in Christ is still the absolute best decision I have made in my life. He is Beautiful, Wonderful, and my everything. I make no apologies for and will not shy away from professing my faith in Him when moved to do so. That said, leaving behind the religious closet of shame and condemnation has also been one of the best decisions I believe the Lord has led me to make. No regrets and no going back to “the closet.”
Yes, there has been the loss of some friendships, and I am still in transition of redeveloping a support system. But regardless, I am freer than I have ever been in my life. I am free to love God from an authentic place of worship with my whole being unencumbered and unashamed. I am free to love others from a state of being that is grounded in reality and not idealism or talking points. I am free to serve our community in a real life-giving way, not a defensive and self-preserving way.
Yep, been out for a year now, so very glad I did. Thank you to the many new and old friends who have been trustworthy, encouraging, and very helpful. Love you!